My ramblings

Okay, so it's like this. I have been hurt. She's taught me two things. The first is that I DO have to stand up for myself, cause people will run all over you otherwise, including the one's we love and who claim to love us. The second is not to trust anyone. All it does is allow people to cut you deeper with a larger blade. These are fine lessons, and ones that I have taken to heart, but here's the problem. I met a girl who is great. She's confident, gentle, and in a strange way gives me a peace again. A different kind of peace, but a peace none the less. And she is also sexier then I can describe. Though I know that she's someone special, I just can't let her in. I try, but all I do is feel like I'm selling her a ruby and giving her red plastic. I know that I can do so much more. I can be so happy and fun loving like I used too, but I'm having a difficult time doing that. I'm not actually looking for feedback here, I'm just venting. I hope that I can do this... And if you read this, just give me time please, and be patient. Neither of us are wanting an instant relationship, but I know I can be so much more than I am... I just need a little while.